The Deserving Man

I was doing research for a project I'm handling at work. I was googling Filipino male models and for some odd reason, I came upon this article entitled "Filipino Men do not Deserve Filipinas."
With a catchy title like that, who can help but click? Reading through it, I believe the article raises interesting yet not-so-new points. It's pretty much summarized in this paragraph (I numbered the parts I want to discuss):

(1) One definition among many that comprise the holistic definition of a man is to be a provider. (2) Sadly, for guys who want to take comfort in the concept of female economic equality with men; this is really an excuse of abdicating their roles as providers. (3) It’s a wake-up call to Filipino men; the fact that many women from all class levels, would consider it a more viable option to hook up with foreign men and migrate to other countries, as opposed to marrying a local Filipino who couldn’t or wouldn’t step up to his role as a man and provide for her. (4) That should be a wake-up call to Pinoys, that they haven’t been handling the business by preparing themselves to be a good provider; or if they’re at the right age, to BE a good provider. They should have the right values and character to be a viable employee, and a producer of value regardless of what they do.

Well, my step-by-step take on this:

1. Man as provider: The article speaks of a "holistic" definition yet reverts to the centuries old stereotype that men should be provider. Doesn't do much to uplift the image of mail order brides or Filipinas married to foreign men, because this really just says the woman likes the old ways better, when she could just be a housewife taking care of kids since the man provides the money anyway.
2. Concept of female economic equality with men: This is an assumption. I really don't think men bum out because they think "men and women are equal now." Equal or not, a person who is lazy is, well, lazy by choice. He could be lazy because Mom gave him everything and now believes life owes him the same kindness. He could also be lazy because Mom gave him NOTHING, and now that he can get something without working for it, he'll take advantage of the situation. There's really no one way to look at this.
3. women from all class levels, would consider it a more viable option to hook up with foreign men: AHK! Seriously -_- This part totally cries "Gold digger!"
4. Becoming a good provider: Preparations for such a role apply to men AND women. Being a provider shouldn't just be seen as an end product, as "providing for the family." Sure, I see lots of single mothers out there, the fathers nowhere to be found. But these women got pregnant because of a choice they also made. These women chose to "provide" life, and thus owe it to their children to provide love and basic life necessities. You can't just blame your supposed hardships on a man who turns out to be a good-for-nothing. But that's beside the point. I see nothing wrong in finding a partner who can provide. But the woman must make sure she can take care of things even in the absence of a (mature) partner.

So, what I really think is that thinking of who-deserves-who is a myopic way of viewing things. A better way to do things would be to look at the "how"--How can I deserve her? How can I deserve him? Life is a lot of work, and it requires time and effort from all of us. It requires that we learn and grow, that we tend to the life given us, as well as the life or lives that we in turn make when we come of age.

What keeps you from being beautiful?

This is the question posed to me by an app I found on Facebook. The app is by Procter & Gamble and I believe it's meant to give you advice on how to care for your skin, hair and body. All you have to do is answer the multiple choice quiz.

Upon choosing "Body" I was asked to answer What keeps you from being beautiful? 
Oh, and guess what, among the barriers to beauty is DARK COMPLEXION. Isn't it swell how this app further plants into my head the idea that dark skin is ugly? No, I don't have dark skin, but I used to because I did lots of outdoor sports. Boy, did I hate it when my family kept telling me to quit the track team because I was getting dark. They didn't see the successes I made when I placed in the WNCAA in high school and competed in the UAAP in college. It was the "ugly" skin and not the hard work and effort my skin symbolized.

To add insult to injury, the app's next step, the Summary page even tells me "You feel your body could be beautiful, if only it didn't SUFFER from DARK COMPLEXION."

as if some extra melanin is an actual sickness equal in severity to cancer.
And that, my friends, is how to push whitening products to people.

Tell them they're ugly.

Published in paper wasp, Australia

This has never happened to me before: 2 acceptances in one day (the other one in this earlier post). I didn't even know about the acceptance of two of my haiku in paper wasp, an international poetry publication based in Queensland. As their website states,

paper wasp [is a] print magazine, which is published quarterly. It is devoted to the Japanese verse forms: haiku, senryu, renga, haibun and tanka.

They're open to submissions by the way. So do check them out:)

Took a picture of my contributor's copy. Came in a cute envelope with a cute doggy stamp :3

Upcoming Appearance: A Hundred Gourds 1:4 Magazine

Received an acceptance today from Ms. Lorin Ford, Editor of A Hundred Gourds Magazine. One of my haiku will appear in Issue 1:4 of the magazine.

Thank God :)

I'm also thankful for being able to work with one of the editors of another haiku pub--Heron's Nest. Ferris Gilli was assigned to be my editor and she helped me weave better, tighter haiku through her honest critique. It has been a while since an editor responded to me with little more than a form letter, so this is truly a breath of fresh air. With the shortage of reading material in the Philippines, I've been struggling to self-edit my work lately. Got a couple haiku in for consideration in Heron's Nest's September issue. Crossing my fingers. :)

Disapproving cat meets most interesting man in the world

I was browsing the net for cute cats coz I love cats
...but can't own one coz I have allergies. :(

I found out about this town in Taiwan called Houtong Cat Village (侯硐貓村). There are sooooo many strays walking around, and tourists actually go here to take pics of the tabbies and calicos. I wanna go here soooo bad :>

I was so amused by one of the cats featured in Epicurious Travels because it's so fluffy and... angry. It reminded me of that meme "The most interesting man in the world." So I turned it into one :D

Enterfactory /Club Binbit Scam

Searched around the net regarding this mobile subscription (SCAM) service called Club Binbit because I noticed they're still at it, putting up their deceptive banner ads everywhere. They must really be making lots of money from the people they tricked because I've found several posts already, warning of Binbit's cunning way of siphoning your prepaid load. Made a previous post about this here.

Now I'm collecting some of the top sites/forums I found, sites which might be helpful to those of you out there who are victims/about to be victims of this scam:

DTI and NTC Accepts Complaints Online

X-ray Scanner ad 

How to unsubscribe from Club Binbit

Club Manila East

Victor (my boyfriend) and I have been planning to go on an outing for a while, and summer came and almost went by without us being able to visit a beach or water theme park. Lots of things happened along the way, that's why. But then he suggested we go to Club Manila East because there are wave pools. Personally, I've never experienced a wave pool before, so I was sold.

And so we went there like backpackers, got to explore areas less-visited (ehem, by me)--like the Taytay and Antipolo areas. When we arrived, there weren't many people. And I think I know why. Boy, was my bf angry when the ticketing girl told him that CME no longer issues keys for their huts, cabanas and cabins (which are worth P700-P1,500 a day btw). It was a real rage moment, because the reason this HOTEL AND RESORT club no longer provides keys is that when clients lose the key, they [CME] will have to replace the keys. Uhm...yeah? Of course you have to replace the darned keys. That's part of the business! Anyway, isn't this a security lapse? How are clients able to bring those home anyway? They're supposed to be surrendered at the front desk before leaving.

So now, without keys, it's up to God to watch over our things while we swim and frolic. Oh how swell. Oh wait, we have another option--deposit our valuables in the Vault, for which they charge 6% of the total cost of the things you deposit. That's sans depreciation. So if you have an iPhone, you have to declare it at what...40K? And then pay 6% of 40K, so that's...P2,400! Oh and there's a catch, if you get your stuff, you can't put it back. You'll have to pay again.

Ho ho ho, merry greed-bonanza!

We just took the risk of not securing our stuff somewhere with a lock and hopped around in the wave pool while constantly looking over our shoulders in case a shady folk lurked by. It's good that we were still able to have a great time despite their stupid terms. But I dare say, business won't be good for this one, not for long.

Published in The Asahi Shimbun

Looks like all the hard work has paid off. I've been practicing haiku for a couple of months and been reading all the journals I could get my hands on. Then I started making my own haiku, taking into consideration the different elements in nature as they are, the sky, the air, the sun--and then relate these to the human condition.

Some haiku moments can't really be explained, they just sort of light up in your mind, a kind of enlightenment maybe, and they just have to be written down before the moment passes. Like how the seasons flow. How things die. How things live. How things are beautiful as they are.

Several haiku of mine appear at The Asahi Shimbun, a Japanese publication. The haiku section is edited by David McMurray. Have a read if you have team. The pieces are really short, but certainly worthwhile.

The 3rd Birthday

My boyfriend lent me his PSP and PS3 so I could play those games I missed out on in the PSP and PS3 consoles. After Playstation, I haven't really found a game as immersive as Parasite Eve, Xenogears, Breath of Fire 3 - 5 and Final Fantasy 7 to 9.

As someone who enjoys fantasy and sci-fi novels, RPG games were the way for me to feel what it's like to be in their universe. For an hour or two (or more :D ) each day, I got to live as the main character of an amazing story. Final Fantasy, in particular, took my breath away with their superb world building, characterization and fresh plot lines. On the other hand, Parasite Eve took a more scientific approach, pushing the limits of evolutionary possibility. What if our mitochondria rebelled and are actually intelligent creatures just waiting to awaken? Mitochondria, after all, are said to have been independent organelles before it evolved to become a part of the cell structure.

Anywhoo when I played The 3rd Birthday and Final Fantasy XIII, I've noticed the trend these days of game makers putting more effort on breath-taking effects rather than story. They've begun (over)using the usual tropes for mass appeal: Love triangles, sexy girls you can "dress up," outcast characters and most notably, characters with amnesia. I mean come on, it's great that I have to go find out the character's past, but if that's all there is to the story, I think I'll just wiki the synopsis to get things over with. I bet I won't miss much anyway if I don't play the game. Most supporting characters in newer games are also not fleshed out well. In Final Fantasy XIII for instance, you have characters with varying diction and accents, but you don't get much backstory after that. Characters run around shouting Save the World--a world you don't really care to save since you've not been given a chance to know it better/explore.

Leave the arcade games in the arcade. Yeah they're fun, but that's not all there is to it. I hope I get the chance to play a real RPG again, with a real story and a fresh plot.